Me: Can I have some of your water?

J: Sure Lindsey, because I’m your brother and I love you and I care about you.

This is a book.. I can’t ctrl+f key words… I have to actually read the long, long chapter….

oodalolly:

-“Dive,” by Phil Roland

[[via submetropolitan]]

I feel like this is a very rare example of a successful concrete poem. Props to Phil, as usual. 

“I have a lot of studying to do.”

Translation: “I have a lot of Harry Potter to read.”

rudyfrancisco:

There is nothing more intimidating than blank page waiting to be turned into a masterpiece 

3 more to go. 

I got a lesson in responsibility for Christmas. w00tw00t~ 

I need to fart.

But I’m in the library and there’s people and I think this might be a loud one. Ummmmmmm…. fUck iT, s3n1or y3ar~~~~

Along with this weird desire to be nice..

I just stood outside in the cold, holding a load of heavy books, for 20+ minutes to talk to a very eager lady who really wanted to convince me that Jesus and his lady friend are coming soon (apparently the second coming involves a holy lady, a she-God, a Holy Mother). I would’ve ignored her, but when she stopped me I thought she was asking for directions. And I’ve always felt bad for these “haveyoumetJesus”-ers. They’re like the people outside Albertson’s asking for donations for the orphans, except annoyingly religious and they’re asking for your soul, not money. 

Anyways. The lady had bad breath and I breathed it in for 20+ minutes. I better be getting some good presents this year.